C.b. Roberts wtites

Transformation

I'm not afraid of dying, 

Sometimes I'd welcome the relief. 

It's the living that scares me, 

Always stalking me like a thief.

To take a chance, 

To say how I feel. 

Possibilities of rejection, 

The pride that it would steal.

I'm forcing myself to become cold now, 

With not a care in the world. 

Packaged up nicely, 

My heart is now furled.

Bottled inside, 

Anger starts to seethe,  

When love isn't returned, 

It’ll force you to your knees.

Contentment turns to resentment, 

Acceptance to pure hate. 

Caged by too many questions, 

I lie trembling at the gate.

I'll raise up a new me, 

Stand broken in chaotic glory. 

Forever a pillar of strength, 

With silent lips, I'll tell my story.

Overflowing with emptiness, 

Nothing to feel, nothing to give. 

I'll accept that I was weak, 

It's myself I have to forgive.

I’m not afraid to fight alone, 

I don’t care what anyone thinks. 

This is me after the fall, 

After forever on the brink.

My demons are unleashed now, 

They're wreaking havoc on my soul. 

It's with a sigh of acceptance 

I relinquish all control.

I hand over the reins, 

I brace for the ride. 

Let today mark the day, 

The man you knew has finally died.